“Children grew up, my husband and I are like strangers. “

My husband and I are now pensioners. As soon as the children and work left, it turned out that nothing connects us at all. There are no common topics of conversations, interests, events. We can sit all evening every apartment in our corners of the apartment and not say a word. Make an apartment or cottage repair, travel or go to events – any body movements cause a husband of fierce rejection in her husband, if only he would not touch him. At the same time, he believes that everything is fine with us, everything suits him.

From the outside, we are a normal, friendly family where my husband does not smoke and does not drink, we have everything (our own apartment, car, cottage). No one will understand me if I declare a divorce, there is no reason. In fact, we are only binded by everyday habits. The husband is not serious about my attempts to declare such a meager life, perfectly understanding that to share all the property is now equivalent to a destructive revolution and that I myself will not decide on such a feat.

How to persuade yourself that living under one roof with a completely stranger is a norm? Daughter, for example, thinks so.

Alla, I want to congratulate you and tell

you that finally the time has come when you can completely take up yourself!

The children have grown up, all important social conditions are fulfilled, and your husband directly shows you that you can now ride rollers, go alone in Sochi, draw paintings, relax, watch TV shows, meet with girlfriends, learn languages and so on.

This situation scares you, most likely, for the reason that you have given your family for many years of life, and not yourself. It was convenient for you, clear and safe. But everyone has grown up, and, it turns out, everyone has their own lives. You were not in demand, out of work, and have got into a fairly unpleasant, painful crisis. You can go and overcome it if you just start to slowly do something for yourself.

Try to find your true needs. Write a list of 100 desires. What did you want to realize earlier, but never did?

Do not cling to your husband. It will connect when your mood, energy and condition change will change. When you become active, interesting to yourself, I am sure that your husband will want to share your interests with you.

And now you have an internal challenge to become yourself and begin to live with those desires that have long been asking for realization. Everything is ahead! Good luck!

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